Bathtime
For Joe
by luvhandlz
Rating: R
Joe Friday lay in a bath of frothy pink bubbles. His right arm was cuffed
to the radiator with his regulation handcuffs. Surrounded by glowing candles,
he stared lovingly at the photograph of J. Edgar Hoover in a clinging silk
teddy. On the photograph was inscribed, "To J With Love from Pooky".
The bathroom door opened and Officer Bill entered, clad only in a pair
of leather boxer shorts. The shorts were at least two sizes too small, forcing
his manly paunch to hang over the waistband. He had liberated them from
the evidence locker two days earlier and worn them ever since.
He crossed to the sink and bent down to splash water on his face; the leather
shorts scrunched horribly and the pale globes of his buttocks shone sallowly
in the candlelight. Sergeant Friday gazed at this apparition, his chest
heaving. He felt a burning in his loins as Office Bill began to noisily
gargle at the sink.
"I must have you now!" Joe cried. He leapt from the tub and emitted a plaintive
bleat as the forgotten handcuffs checked his headlong rush. His feet flew
out from under him and he struck his head on the lip of the tub. The last
thing he heard before passing out was:
"Jesus, Joe. If I'd known you were in such a hurry, I wouldn't have gargled."
End
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